On the topic of a platonic love or friendship slash relationship… I more often than not ask the questions: “Is such a thing possible?” Does “not acting” on one’s desire deem a friendship as being platonic just for the sake of not acting on it? Or does it mean that over and above all, two individuals from the opposite sex (or same sex) cannot fathom the idea of not feeling some sort of way about the other?
I mean, I for one am a considerably amicable individual, but how does one know that the other party involved feels the SAME way? The way in which the nature of a relationship is just that, -friendship.
I for one; prefer the company of the opposite sex. All reasons that are distinctly different to the other. However the question still stands, do they feel the same way?
Here are a few things to consider in an attempt to make a relationship as such potentially “work”:
-Start with the difficult conversations.
Realism. That’s all. What could be easier than making ones intention clear from the get-go?
This for one eliminates the possibility of potential tension that could conceivably result in the subsequence of a failed friendship due to a misunderstanding or just plain miscommunication.
While you should never act on it, it is sometimes worth acknowledging to yourself that this does form part of what makes the platonic friendship work so well.
Yup. It’s as simple and as complicated as that. Do you trust yourself fully to commit to just that? Friendship? If yes, the tough part is out of the way.
All possibilities aside, have trust in your decision. After all, it was made for a reason.
We are after all responsible for our own decisions. Regardless of the circumstance. With that being said; believe in what is and trust both parties involved to maintain and fulfil platonic compact.
-Create CLEAR ground rules.
It is considerably better. That’s it. Transparency is key.
As mentioned, intention is everything. I for one believe that what one puts into the universe materialises way more rapidly if it is welcomed.
So with that, ground rules are an important thing to consider. Therefore it is much better to make it clear; crystal clear that it would be much better to have a friendship that matters, for whichever reason; be it; work or study pressures, current relationship status or religion of any kind. Watching out for one another and spending time together is of most importance and that friendship is all that remains.
-Pas d’attentes? …as the French say…
Translated: “No expectations”.
Part of what discerns platonic from romantic love is the infamous act of expectation. (Looouuudder for those in the back).
Yup. That’s all there is to it really. expectation, expectation, and more expectation.
Platonic agreements doesn’t get held in the same regard and high standard as said relationship for many reasons. Reasons candidly of which does not require sharing a home, kids, or pet’s maybe? -You’re close, (and potentially) lifelong friends.
-Conclusively… It’s not complicated, no REALLY.
Platonic agreements will always be part of the human condition, I mean. We survive by investing in social doings. All-in-all we award different values to every person we meet, and we love each one in a matchless way. While love might be fraught with complexities, platonic love is the one place where you can definitively say: “it’s not complicated”.
Case in point? As Aristotle so eloquently puts it:
“Friendship is a thing most necessary to life, since without friends no one would choose to live, though possessed of all other advantages.“